not so deep (chatty)

7 ways to become comfortable with yourself

Hi loves,

I’m back again with your weekly dose of motivation, so, here are 7 easy and simple ways  to become comfortable with yourself (all tried and checked by me, also these points are going to be simple so I’m not going to ramble like I usually do, hallelujah!)

look at people who make you feel confident

STOP LOOKING AT INSTAGRAM MODELS WHO DO NOTHING FOR YOUR SELF ESTEEM. Social media can be both a blessing and a curse – use it wisely! Follow people who make you feel confident, look at photographs of people with the same body type as you, see how confident they are and the kind of outfits they’re wearing – take inspiration from them! If you find yourself looking at people who make you feel inadequate, what is that doing for you? Nothing!! Unfollow and move on!

stop caring about what others think

I’ll be the first person to say that this is a lot easier said than done and sometimes takes years of practice, but a little improvement each day doesn’t hurt anyone, right? Stop caring what other people think! If these people are strangers; they don’t know you, you’ll probably never see them again in your life and they’re probably not even paying attention to you in the first place. I constantly worry about what other people think and then I have to have a reality check with myself and think Chlo, stop flattering yourself. Nobody cares that much to even spend a millisecond of their time thinking about you or what you’re doing. Get over it.

listen to badass music

Honestly, this one works. Be fierce. If you’re about to go somewhere or do something and your anxiety is going through the roof, put your headphones in and play some badass music, honestly, it makes you feel like you’re in one of those movies walking away from a burning building / explosion because you’ve shown the whole world who’s boss and that no one can mess with you. If you’re unable to wear headphones during the process of whatever it is you’re doing, listen to the music just before you’re about to do it – for example, as you’re in your room getting ready for it or before you get out of the car.

wear clothes that make you feel comfortable & at your best

Hey people, here’s a thing – you have the right to wear whatever the fuck you want. This ties in with the point of ‘stop caring about what other people think’ but honestly, wear what YOU want to wear. Whatever makes you feel most confident and comfortable – throw it on!! If you want to try out a new outfit but are too shy to do it in a place you might see people you know, go somewhere else! Go to the next city and wear it, or wear it when you go on holiday. If you like it and feel good in it – great, if not, no worries – you tried it and you don’t have to worry about it again!

pursue your passions

Stop depriving yourself of the things you were born to do. Who cares if other people will think it’s uncool, it makes you happy and that’s all that matters. Stop depriving yourself and suffocating your creativity – pursue it and let it flourish, whatever it may be. It will help you to become more in touch with yourself and make you a happier person. Trust me.

stop beating yourself up for being a certain way / liking certain things

Again, this ties in with my last point but I used to constantly beat myself up all the time for being a certain way, I’d compare myself to others and wonder why I couldn’t be like this person or that person and why couldn’t I be cool like that girl and why did I have to like the things liked when it seemed like no one else did and blah blah blah.  You get the idea. The solution? Stop it!! Stop it right now. Stop beating yourself up for being YOU. You are an individual and you are special, please do not spend your whole life wishing you were somebody else because that is such a waste of the incredible person you are. Be unique! We need more individuality and creativity these days, the world needs more of it. The world needs you!

cut out any negative people in your life

CUT THEM OFF. Unfollow them. Delete them. Block them. Tell them they’re bringing negative energy into your life and you cannot be around them anymore. I would rather have 0 friends than 10 who ridicule me and cut me down at every chance they get. If people make you feel like you can’t express yourself and be who you are, GET RID OF THEM. This is your life and you can take control and responsibility for it anytime you choose. Grab it with both hands and tell the world you’re not going to suppress who you are for anybody. 

And there we have it! Let me know if you’d like more of these posts as I have a lot more points up my sleeve – I thought I’d do 7 today ’cause it’s Monday and you know, one point for each day of the week.


I hope you all enjoyed this and remember that you are a wonderful, creative and inspiring individual – the world is very lucky to have you.

All my love,

Chloe .xx

48 thoughts on “7 ways to become comfortable with yourself

  1. All of these things you listed are the exact same phrases I always tell myself!!! Becoming comfortable with yourself is hard, it takes a long time and sometimes you have days where you’re not comfortable with yourself. Great post as always lovely xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Listening to badass music is literally the best thing. I always feel super self conscious at the gym but putting on base style music really helps!!

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Love this so much 💜 I follow yoga girl which is a famous yoga teacher and she makes me feel so good about myself which is the most beautiful of social media. Following people who inspire you and not make you feel like shit. I’m still learning to not care about what others think of me and to not compare myself. This only cause less self esteem and anxiety. Music can really make me feel so good about myself. I’m also glad I cut ties with toxic people. It’s so much better have a few friends than a million of fake friends. Quality over quantity always. Thank you so much for this beautiful post 💜🌠 I love you xoxo

    Liked by 1 person

  4. LOVE THIS!! I recently un-followed lots of Instagram accounts that made me feel a little rubbish about myself. I decided I wanted to follow people with a similar lifestyle, similar body type (like you’ve mentioned), so I could relate to more instead of constantly compare!

    Also the point regarding beating yourself up for the things you life is a biggy for me! I deny myself of doing certain things because it’s not the done thing and people will think it’s weird, but you’re totally right – we’re all individuals so will of course like different things? Let’s embrace our little passions!!

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you!! It’s always good to have a social media clear out and it definitely benefits me, every few months or so I’ll go through all my socials and unfollow anyone that isn’t making me feel too great. I too always beat myself up for liking certain things because I’m like no Chloe that isn’t cool hahaha, but it’s such a damaging mindset to have and I need to embrace the things I love rather than push them away! xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  5. Social media is such a huge influence and it really seems so silly to compare ourselves to people that are living a different life than we are! Also, wearing what makes me feel comfortable changed how I viewed myself & I became so comfortable with myself, my style, and how I projected myself to the world… these are such good tips & everyone needs to read them!! 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  6. Wearing clothes that you’re not comfortable in is the worst! I remember buying this cheap, short dress because I wanted a new outfit. And every time I walked, the dress would kind of ride up. So I spent the whole night pulling it down and feeling self-conscious.
    Following your passions and doing what makes you happy, without giving a damn what people who hold no real meaning in your life think. That’s what I take from this and I think that’s a wonderful message! 🙂 xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly! At the end of the day we should wear things for ourselves and not for others – why put yourself through feeling uncomfortable for absolutely nothing?! Thanks for reading lovely xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  7. Haha music can totally make all the difference to my mood and motivation! This is a wonderful list of very important points – as you said, people probably care a lot less than we think, which is a key reason to embrace our individual characteristics and unique place in the world. Once you stop battling against who you are for the sake of pleasing others, life definitely takes on a brighter shade. Thank you so much for sharing! Xx

    Liked by 1 person

  8. Although I have read all this in zillion self help books but sometimes with the pace of life we forget all this and this was a beautiful reminder !!
    Thanks Chloe
    Have a great day ahead !!

    Liked by 1 person

  9. Thank you Chloe for these tips. I really need to do the first and second one. You honestly are my go-to source about self-love and self-confidence, so thank you so much for being such a good role model.

    Liked by 1 person

  10. This is freaking fantastic. Bring on more! Cutting out negative people and pursuing our passions, yes! Focusing on the things that I love and not giving energy to people who just want to criticize or throw a wet blanket onto everything has been so helpful in putting me in a happier place. I honestly feel the most beautiful when I’m doing things that I love and being unapologetic about it.

    Liked by 1 person

  11. YES to not caring about what other people think. I’m always acting like a total goof in public & IDC cuz you’re literally never gonna see those people again! so much more important to have fun & be happy! loved this 💚

    Liked by 1 person

  12. GIRL I could not resonate with this post more! I think the following people who make you feel good on social media is SO important – like you said, social media can be a blessing or a curse. Personally, I don’t find Instagram models do much (ie anything) else for me other than make me wish I had bigger lips, a bigger ass or a house in australia so I don’t follow any and it DEFINITELY helps my self esteem to do that 🙂 Loved this post!xxx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. How do you always manage to sum up what I’m trying to say in literally 2 sentences or less when it takes me a whole post hahahaha, couldn’t agree more!! They don’t do anything for me either apart from make me realise all of the things I don’t have, when I should be concentrating on the things I do! xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  13. I blooming love this post! Put a right smile on my face and has definitely given me some things to look at in terms of my confidence! Love the point about badass music, I do this far often than not and have to hold the urge to strut down the street ahhahah! Xx

    Liked by 2 people

      1. It is but I do have moments where I wonder whether I have done the right thing. Unfortunately it’s so much easier to remember the good about someone rather than the bad. xx

        Liked by 1 person

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