learning to have your own opinion

Hi angels,

I feel like lately throughout my posts and just the way I’ve been growing in general, it’s become apparent that women are in fact now taking over the world – we’re going for world domination because we’ve stayed silent for too long and now we’re burning it all down and won’t take any more of your shit. This goes for anything to do with women being silenced, suppressed or shown as unequal – we’re coming to shut you all down basically – we’ve got our war paint on and we’re ready to fight.

Because of this amazing phenomenon that has really come to light over the past couple of years (and continues to get stronger every day) I have learned that I as a woman, do not need to be the definition of ‘feminine’ in order to please others.

If I want to shave my hair off and dye my armpit hair blue, then I can. If I want to scream and shout from the rooftops and swear because I don’t give a shit that it’s deemed as being ‘unladylike’, I can.

And most importantly, something that has really allowed me to come into my own lately, is the fact that I have learned that I, as a woman, am allowed to have an opinion.

Yes, me. Little old me. Little old me who society would tell to sit down and shut up or to get back in the kitchen, little old me over here is allowed to have an opinion and most importantly, I am allowed to share my opinion. I’m allowed to exercise that right as a woman and I am allowed to tell you exactly what I think, because I will no longer be silenced. We as women, will no longer be silenced.

I will never say that I have followed society’s stereotypes as being a woman – if a time came where I needed to share my opinion or I was forced to stand up for myself, then I would, but other than that I would shy away from everything and just kind of stay quiet and unnoticed, unless called upon. I wouldn’t want to disturb the peace as it were, I wouldn’t want to cause unnecessary drama or have people dislike me because I overshared or said something unfeminine that would deem me any less in their eyes – I wanted everyone to like me.

…Until this feminist movement came along (and don’t get me wrong, I understand that this movement has been happening forever, but in recent times through social media etc. it has become a lot more prominent).

People are scared of women with opinions and a voice. They’re intimidated by it, people don’t like strong, independent women, and you know what that means?

We have to start shouting a little fucking louder.

Nowadays, if I have an opinion, I’ll say it. If I think someone is wrong or I need to share my thoughts and views on something, I don’t wait until I’m called upon, I will just say it. If someone makes a sexist remark to me, even a subconscious one (do you know how many sexist comments us women get every day that we don’t even realise are sexist?) then I will call that person out on it and I’ll correct them, or educate them on what they’re saying.

It may well make me unpopular, it may make people perceive me as a ‘man hater’ – bitter and cold, but do I give a fuck? No. I don’t hate men, I hate ignorance. I hate misogyny. I hate uneducated people who feel like their throwaway comments can simply be passed off as just that – throwaway – a joke, even. You’ll have people tell you to get a sense of humour or (my personal favourite) “wow, you must be fun at parties” – for your information yes, I am fun at parties, I’m a fucking great time. But you my friend? You’re insecure and your masculinity is about as fragile as the way you view us women.

But the truth is, we’re not fragile, we’re not vulnerable. We don’t need to be saved or for you to validate us – we weren’t put on this Earth for the sole purpose of being attractive to you. We can save ourselves and in actual fact we don’t need men at all in the grand scheme of things, if us females could find a way of reproducing without men, there’d be no need for them at all. Slowly but surely, natural selection will wipe them out as great Mother Nature works her magic.

I’m kidding, of course – feminism is about equality for everybody and not about hating men which is a very common misconception and the exact reason you’ll get immature boys turning their noses up and mocking you when you tell them you’re a feminist.

But like I said, it’s their fragile masculinity and that’s their problem. They’re the type of guys who will claim they can’t tell if another man is attractive because they’re so afraid of looking unmasculine or gay by doing so, and do we want to surround ourselves with those type of people ladies? No, so let’s forget about them and move on.

Never okay, I repeat never let your voice be silenced – if you have something to say, fucking say it, be loud, be wild, swear a little – who cares if it’s deemed ‘unfeminine’, why are we labelling ourselves like that anyway? Your opinion is just as valid as the next person’s, say what you think, don’t let people talk over you or disregard what you’ve said because of the fact you’re a woman. Call people out when they disrespect you, don’t stand down and don’t be silenced. This goes for interactions with all people, not just men – I’ve lost friends through standing my ground and I’m a lot better for it, I used to let people walk all over me and allow them to treat me like shit because I was so scared of causing upset by saying something – like I said, all I ever wanted to do was keep the peace, so I’d stay quiet and continue to let them treat me bad because I wanted to be friends, I wanted people to like me. The second I’d had enough and decided that actually, I wasn’t going to let this continue, I was going to use my voice and stand up for myself – they didn’t like it and you know what? We argued, we fell out and stopped being friends.

Am I sorry for it? No. Was it my fault? No. They just wanted people to push around and the second I decided I didn’t want to be that person for them anymore, they didn’t like it.

Don’t let anyone try to tell you who you are, like I said, it may well make me unpopular with people nowadays, I may come across as defensive, blunt, cold or snappy but honestly, I couldn’t care less. Do not mess with me. I’m exercising the right to voice my opinion more than ever and best believe I will not allow myself to be silenced again, people can be intimidated by me and make comments but I I won’t let people try and tell me who I am or speak for me and I definitely will not allow myself to be on the receiving end of sexist comments or throwaway remarks – my voice will be counted and it will be heard – best believe I’ll call you out on it and educate you on your ignorance, whether you want to hear it or not.

Never let anyone silence you and always make sure that your voice is heard, because you have one and you can change the world with it – we are changing the world with it. Every day, women are changing the world. We’re coming for you and there’s nothing you can do about it.

Click here to listen to some fierce, girl power ballads I like to play when I’m feeling fierce like this – support your female artists ladies ♡

I love you all so very much and remember that your voice is always welcome here, express your opinion and do not apologise about it to anyone. Never let yourself be silenced and learn to have your own opinion because it counts and it is valid, you are valid, and you always have been.


All my love,

Chloe .xx

33 thoughts on “learning to have your own opinion

  1. EXACTLY!!! Men/Boys are somehow really intimidated by powerful women who say what they’re thinking!
    I once said something about women taking over the world to a (male) classmate and he looked at me in a very weird way and said: “Are you a feminist?” And he said it in a way like it was a bad thing!! That made me really mad so I said: “Yes! Got a problem with that?” And that made him quiet, haha!
    Thank you for sharing this kick-ass post! xx

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Exactly haha, they’re incredibly intimidated by it – it’s the whole fragile masculinity thing, which we need none of in 2018 or for the rest of our lives. You’re welcome lovely & thank you for reading! xx

      Liked by 1 person

  2. Chloe, the most appropriate response I can think of to this is yasssss queen!! Shout it from the rooftops gal, and we’ll all be echoing you 💛 By the way, I absolutely adore the way you write. It’s like having a conversation with an old friend. So thank-you, so very much lovely Chloe, for sharing your wonderfully formed words and stories xo

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Ahhh thank you so much angel! 💛 This made me smile so much and this is honestly one of the biggest compliments I could ever receive, it means such a lot. Thank you thank you xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  3. This post was such an inspiration and really got me thinking. I think especially when I was younger I tended to copy people’s opinions out of fear of judgement. As a child I always wanted to fit in so badly, so that was just a natural result of that need to be just like everyone else. Only when I got older and more mature, I started to feel extremely lost because I wasn’t even sure who I was anymore. I had been pretending to be someone else for so long I had forgotten. It took a while for me to figure myself out again and accept the beauty in speaking for yourself, having your own opinions and standing by them. If we don’t speak up, we don’t have the right to expect change. Change comes from people SPEAKING THEIR MINDS. I love love love this post so much Chloe, thank you for sharing this and speaking your mind! xxx

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Me too! When I was younger (before high school) I’d just go along with what everyone else was saying because that just seemed to be the right thing to do in those days – like you said, you wanted to fit in. Back then it was easier to fit in than stand out, right? As always you’ve took the words right out of my mouth and I couldn’t have said this any better! I lost myself through suppressing my voice and trying to play the part of someone else, until I realised that by doing that, no one was playing the part of me – and that was MY job!! Thank you for reading and for your words of wisdom as always lovely xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  4. MY FUCKING QUEEN. Chloe, is there EVER a post you write that does not resonate with me or make me want to stand up and say “hell the fuck YES!”? If there is, I haven’t read it! I absolutely love how we get to read about your evolution as a boss ass queen; you’re inspirational as HELL. xxxx

    Liked by 2 people

  5. FUCKING YES!!!!! I love this so much ❤️ If we’re too scared to speak our truth and use our voices, we’ll never be heard… you literally took the words right out of my mouth. You rock 👏🏼

    Liked by 1 person

  6. This was such a beautiful post to read! ❤😍👏 I really loved it. I felt the same way as you and also was silence many times and let people walk on me. Now, I’m not going to be silenced anymore and am always saying my opinion which in some cases isn’t appreciated. I don’t care anymore like you just said. It’s good to be powerful as a woman. We ars strong together and can make a difference in this world when we speak up 💪❤ Nothing will stop us. Who run the world? Girlssss! 👏

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I was literally clapping while reading this! Beautifully written and it really is true, you should never let anyone silence you. Proud of you for sharing this lovely❤❤❤❤❤❤

    Liked by 2 people

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