deep · not so deep (chatty)

why loving yourself is the biggest F You



Hi loves,

I hope the title of this post makes sense. What I’m trying to say is that basically, loving yourself is the biggest fuck you that you can give to society. Society feeds off of our insecurities, it thrives off them, so loving yourself is the biggest way you can say actually, this time, you don’t get to win. I do.

Even if you don’t believe it, say it. Even if you don’t love yourself. Even if you pick yourself apart and think that sometimes you should keep your mouth shut and you wish you weren’t so sensitive or you wish you were funnier. Say you love yourself. Even if you don’t believe it, one day, you will.

People are weird, I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, people are strange – we all work in different ways and we don’t get along with everybody. We don’t always see eye to eye and sometimes people take pride in making other people feel bad about themselves. The best thing you can do in this situation? Tell them that you love yourself. Even if you don’t! Even if you hate yourself, despise yourself, tell these people that you love yourself because what can they say to that, really? It means that nothing they say will even touch the sides – why would you care about what they think when you don’t listen, don’t absorb it? Why does it matter if they don’t like the shirt you’re wearing? You love it. That’s your fashion, it’s your way of self expression, it’s you, and what do you have? Self love. Even if you don’t, tell them you do. Fake it ‘til you make it. Isn’t that what they say?

People think you talk too much. Okay? So what? If it’s not harming anyone then why do you care? You love yourself, right? You love every inch of yourself including the parts that no one claps for, so why does it matter if they don’t like something? You don’t need their validation – you validate yourself, that will always be enough.

We all make mistakes, no one is perfect and we all fuck up sometimes. We make stupid decisions and say things we don’t mean but the important thing to remember is that no one actually knows what they’re doing here, we’re all just slowly making our way through life hoping that everything will turn out okay in the end. There’s a popular saying that says everyone has their own life manual and no two people’s are the same, and it’s true. There is no one set way to live life, there’s no one rule book you have to follow. No one knows what the hell they’re doing and that’s okay, we’re all just figuring it out as we go along. No one is perfect, there’s so much pressure on people to always do and say the right thing, but how do we know what that is sometimes? There’s always someone that’s going to tell you you’re wrong, not everyone is going to agree with all of your actions but like I said – as long as it isn’t harming or negatively affecting anyone else, why does it matter? Do you know what you’re doing? I don’t. I’m experimenting and working my way through life wondering if this is the correct way I should be doing things but in all honesty, does anyone actually know?

There’s a quote that says “If you had everything you ever wished for, would you finally be happy or would you just find new things to complain about?”

I think we all know the answer to that one.

Nothing in life is ever going to be ‘perfect’ – what even is perfect? The definition of perfect is different to each individual – beauty is in the eye of the beholder. There is no one set way to be perfect or live perfectly – it doesn’t exist. Life is never going to be perfect because if it was it would be boring, we all have this idea in our minds that one day everything will be 100% perfect and we won’t need to worry anymore, but when you actually take time to sit and think about it…is that what we all want? Really?

You want to wake up one day and know that there’s nothing in your life that you need to work on? To improve? Everything has reached it’s full potential and now you’re going to stay in that same mindset for the rest of your life?

I don’t think so. Imagine how boring that would be? To just come to a sudden halt and think there’s nothing else regarding you or your life that you need to change? You can never stop learning, you can never stop discovering and experiencing and becoming a better person, there’s always room for improvement, there’s always room for more. You want to get to 30 and think “Everything is perfect now, there’s nothing else that I need to work on now for the rest of my life”?

Even if things are ‘perfect’ they won’t stay that way, because people exist, life exists, there is no plan, like I said, we’re all just doing our own thing and hoping it works out alright in the end. There’s always going to be things you don’t like about yourself or your life but you know what? Accept it, work on it, improve it. If it’s something that cannot possibly ever be changed then you’ve got to learn to live with that for the rest of your life so you may as well start liking it already. Become acquainted with it, accept it, move on. Love yourself as you are because I promise you that when you have all of the things you think you’re lacking right now, you will have found ten new things you want instead.

It’s a constant cycle – when you have all of the things you think you want, you’re going to have found more things that you think you need in order to be happy instead and then you’re going to get them and find more things you need and so on. You will never be at a standstill. So embrace it now, stop waiting until you have X, Y and Z in order to be happy. You’ll only find another A, B and C that you think you need once you get there.

Loving yourself is the biggest fuck you you can give society, so do it.

All my love,

Chloe .xx

10 thoughts on “why loving yourself is the biggest F You

  1. How can I like this post 10000 times?! Hell yes girl! Thank you for this amazing post. You’re also such a big inspiration in my life. I always so in sync with your feelings and thoughts. It’s just so important to love ourselves in this fake world and society who constantly try to mske us feel bad and insecure about ourselves. It’s really brave. I also feel like if you aren’t happy with the things you have now you never will. There will be always things you want. You will get a job and you are happy, then you want a home, relationship, family, kids, more luxery stuff. The list is endless. It’s great to grow otherwise life would really be boring. So I agree with you.

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Hahahaha I LOVE YOU, you’re so welcome angel. Your words are always appreciated literally you make me smile the mooooost, I agree with you totally though – the list really is endless, we have to live in the here and now and be happy with what we have!! xx

      Liked by 1 person

  2. I am all for just going with the flow, even as hard as it sometimes seems. I think so many people underestimate how hard it is to actually relax and stop caring about things like the way we look or the way we act and the flaws we point out in ourselves, and half the time, it just gets encouraged by society because there’s usually a product or idea trying to be sold that we can buy into!! It’s infuriating, but I’ve definitely noticed more and more people coming to terms with loving themselves a little bit more, especially in our generation, when we’re probably bombarded with messages of self-hatred the most! This was a beautiful post as per usual Chloe x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Couldn’t have said it better myself girly !! I too have noticed more and more people coming into their own lately and it makes me so happy, there really is a movement happening here and I’m 1000000% for it. Thank you so much angel xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  3. This is definitely something I struggled with a lot more in the past. Now I have more appreciation and love for myself but it does get hard sometimes when the people around you say things that bring you down.

    Liked by 1 person

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