a mini kpop haul

Hi loves,

Today I thought I’d do a little Kpop haul for you all – these aren’t your typical Kpop merchandise items but I didn’t really know what else to title the post so I felt like calling it a Kpop haul would be okay – enjoy .xx

Skeleton Flower
Kim Jonghyun


You may remember a couple of months ago in my February book reviews post I mentioned this book, but didn’t really say much about it – I didn’t feel like I had the words at the time and I wanted to explain it properly somewhere else so, here it is.

This is a book written by Jonghyun from SHINee. I was watching a Korean TV show called Knowing Bros and the guest artists for this particular episode were SHINee, the premise of the show is that it’s set in a classroom and the artists that guest on each episode are exchange students who are joining the school, therefore they each have to fill out an individual fact file and answer questions about themselves which will then be talked about during the show. One of the questions on the form was which job each member would like to have when they grow up and Jonghyun said he wanted to be a writer – they asked him about this and he told them he’d already written a book in 2015 years ago called Skeleton Flower, and this is when I went and bought it.

One of the most poignant things during this part of the show which, in hindsight, is incredibly haunting, is that Jonghyun was asked to repeat his favourite line from the book. He gets embarrassed and doesn’t want to say because he says it’s cringy but eventually he gives in and tells everyone that his favourite line (this has a few different translations but the general consensus) is “He never imagined he would meet such an atrocious depression.”

A lot of people have spoken about it after the fact, but looking back on it now…it’s incredibly alarming and incredibly sad. I don’t feel like I have sufficient words to even discuss it.

The book is fictional but given the content it’s very obvious Jonghyun didn’t just pull these thoughts and feelings out of thin air, to me this was his way of transforming his depression into art, poetry and music, and projecting these emotions onto the characters he created in the story. Reading it for me was a way of being able to see inside his mind and know how he was feeling, and it was very difficult yet beautiful to get through before he did what he did.

If you’ve been on my blog for a while you’ll know my feelings towards all of that and how much it affected (and still does) affect me, this was just another piece of him I felt like I was getting to keep. To be able to get inside his mind and really listen to what was going on, I couldn’t deny myself that. I felt like he was with me as I was going through each page, and it was nice to feel like he was still here for a while, it was comfort.

The whole book is written in Korean, naturally, but there are English translations of the whole thing. I wish my Korean ability was good enough to be able to analyse the book in my own way, the way I would have done had it been in English, but nonetheless, everything about it was beautiful, raw and very emotional. It’s very obvious how much he put into this book and how much time and effort he spent creating it, it felt like he was baring his soul on every page.

What makes it even more special is that Jonghyun also released a mini album to go along with the book (a combination I’ve never really seen before) – at the end of each chapter are the lyrics to a song –  that song then corresponds with the ones on the album, so as you’re going through each chapter you can listen to the song at the end of it and really immerse yourself into the story – the whole thing is very emotional. The album, JONGHYUN The Collection “Story Op.1”, is on Spotify if any of you want to listen to it.

The actual physical copy of the book is equally as beautiful, there are transparent pages filled with words and phrases, lyrics at the end of each chapter, as well as beautiful photographs (taken by Jonghyun himself) featured throughout. So much time and love went into this book and it’s now one of my most prized possessions, because the whole thing was truly made beautifully – both physically and emotionally.

Because it was released in 2015 and not by an official publisher, SHINee’s company no longer sell it therefore it’s a little harder to find on the internet but luckily I managed to get myself a copy which I’m really grateful for, thus this then became my first ‘Kpop’ purchase – I’m very grateful it was this one.

The Notes



BTS have an ongoing storyline throughout their music videos (in the BTS universe) where each of them play themselves but have a character and a storyline to go with it – it’s very hard hitting and they tackle a lot of very deep and serious issues and this is essentially the whole storyline from all of the music videos put together into a book. If you purchase the individual albums they include notes from the stories of the specific music videos and eras and I guess this is just the whole collection of those put together with the addition of new ones that haven’t been released yet. There’s a Korean version, a Japanese version and an English version (God bless) and of course, each version has a different cover.

The issues that they depict and tackle in their music videos are very serious and hard hitting so this is definitely not some kind of light hearted fairy-tale, which I’m extremely happy about. One of the reasons I love BTS is because they’re so real about who they are and what they do, and this is a piece of art – a collection of notes and journal entries that show each of their characters going through the motions that a lot of us go through in real life, it tackles the issues in a respectable way and I really liked the way it was written.

BTS are very serious about what they do and they work extremely hard to ensure that everything is the best it can be, they push themselves to the limits and scrutinise every detail to ensure everything turns out perfect for the people who support them – more often than not companies will just throw out random merchandise left, right and centre because they know that fans will buy it regardless of what it is – BTS could have released any random book and the sales would have been ridiculous regardless of what it was but they didn’t, they made sure it was something worth the money and full of actual content as like I said, companies will stick a brand name on just about any old random thing these days and sell it because they know it’ll do well. Considering BTS’ audience is also of the younger generation, I’m extremely impressed that they’ve released something that caters to an older audience given the subject matter and the extent to which it’s written – the issues in this book are not catered to your average 13 and 14 year olds.

I bought the English version (obviously) and because I pre-ordered it it also came with a cute little notebook of the same colour theme, it’s super beautiful and a book review of it will be coming shortly!

Jonghyun’s Birthday & Music Awards Rings

Birthday Ring


I actually discovered this ring through an unboxing on Youtube when I was on my homepage one day and the video came up in my recommended, so instantly I was intrigued. After watching the unboxing and thinking how beautiful the rings were, I looked into the story behind them.

On the front of the ring is an engraved soundwave, and this soundwave is from Jonghyun’s speech when he had his first win as a solo artist at Music Core on 17th January 2015, so as you can imagine, this was such a milestone and such a significant moment for all of us everywhere. The soundwave says “샤이니 고맙구요, 샤이니 낳아주신 부모님들 감사하구요, 샤이니 월드 사랑합니다” –  “Thank you, SHINee. Thank SHINees’ parents for giving lives to us. I love you, SHINee World.”

On the inside of the ring is his birthday – 8th April 1990, engraved on the inside.

The creator of these rings made them because she wanted to remember this special day for him and therefore thought she would do that in honour of his birthday.

And now, here’s the really special part.

One day, the creator of these rings logged onto Twitter and saw that her mentions were blowing up, she had endless notifications and couldn’t figure out what was going on, until she went onto Jonghyun’s Twitter and saw that he’d tweeted her saying he loved the rings and was wondering if he could have one – in the end, he had a black one, but I’m pretty sure she sent him one of every colour.

Even more people started buying them because of Jjong’s interest and after he passed I think it became even more special to own one, not only because of how beautiful and significant they were in the first place, but because of the fact that he himself had seen them and had therefore come to own one.

I bought mine in rose gold because my every day jewellery is a silver set so I thought having a random rose gold band in there would make it stand out the way I wanted it to, because it was special. It’s now like my comfort blanket because I wear it every day and never take It off, it feels like I have a part of him with me always and that I carry him wherever I go.

At the time Jjong himself tweeted about the rings they sold out straight away and (I believe) it was months before they were re-stocked again, everyone wanted one but no one could get so I was glad that when I went to buy one they were all in stock and I was able to choose what I wanted – I feel very grateful that I own one now.

It came packaged in a beautiful gift bag and box, along with a QR code of the soundwave so that if you scan it, you get taken straight to the clip of Jonghyun saying what’s inscribed on the ring, which I think is really beautiful – it just gives that extra connection to the buyer because you can actually hear his voice saying it. I really love the idea for all of it and I think it was such a beautiful thing to do, the whole thing is very special and I’m very grateful that I now get to carry a piece of Jonghyun around with me forever.

Music Awards Ring



After discovering the birthday ring I realised there was also a music award ring for each of the SHINEE members so of course, I wanted to see the story behind those too and naturally after looking into it, I bought Jjong’s.

The soundwave engraved on this ring is from the Melon Music Awards in 2013 when SHINee won Artist of the Year and it also happened to be their 2000 day anniversary at the same time so again, it was a really special day. Watching their acceptance speeches broke my heart because they’re so overcome with emotion they literally cannot even speak, it’s so humbling to know how hard they worked for it and to see them receiving something they deserve 1000 times over is the best feeling. It was such a beautiful, emotional and heartwarming moment, you can’t help but feel like the proudest person in the world.

Like I said, there was a ring created for each member and so depending on whose you choose, the soundwave of their acceptance speech is engraved on the ring. Jjong could barely even talk he was crying so hard and I’m surprised he wasn’t on the floor, but this is what he managed to say – “엄마 사랑해요. 너무 감사합니다. 정말. SM타운 감사합니다. 정말 너무 고마워요. 샤이니 월드 사랑합니다” – ““I love you, mom. Really appreciate it. Really. Thank you, SM Town. Really thank you. I love you SHINee world.”

Engraved on the inside of the ring is SHINee’s debut date – 25th March 2008.

Each of the members were sent the rings in the colour silver and I decided to buy mine in silver as well – I wear it next to the birthday ring band but I wanted that to stand out on its own, hence why I bought it in rose gold. I wear both of them every day and as I said, it feels like I get to carry around a piece of SHINee and Jjong with me forever.

Rest in peace, little angel. You did well.

All my love,

Chloe .xx

35 thoughts on “a mini kpop haul

    1. Last time I looked they were on Amazon, Ebay and a lot of Korean store websites (can’t remember the names now but they’re the ones everyone uses to buy albums etc). Pretty sure I got mine from Amazon!

      Liked by 1 person

  1. I love the aesthetic of all of the merch – the pastel colours is so beautiful and it does not look like typical merch (which I prefer). The rings are an absolutely beautiful idea and I can see why you would treasure them. xx

    Liked by 1 person

  2. These stuffs look so cute. I love those rings and the story behind them!!❤️
    I’m not a huge kpop fan but I still love to learn more about them— great post as usual ❤️❤️

    Liked by 1 person

  3. I’ve been listening to Kpop for years (goodness, I’m old) and lately I’m realizing that the Kpop industry has a lot of flaws. You have all these “idols” that are pressured into being perfect that they can’t even live the way they want to that they end up having depression or worse develop some weird behavior. It saddens me what happened to Jonghyun. I hope no other artists are depressed and if they are I hope they could get some help. 🙂

    ps. I’m really sorry if this comment seems sad, lol, it’s just my thoughts go out to Jonghyun and his family. 😦

    Liked by 1 person

    1. You’re very right, the industry does have a lot of flaws. I think unless you really understand it / look into it it’s very easy just to believe that it’s this perfect world with perfect people where nothing bad happens but that’s very far from the truth, it’s a gruelling and tiring industry with a lot of comparison and competition and I think over the last couple of years people have come to realise that. Idols are people just like us and I pray that Jonghyun’s passing did some good in the sense that others were able to reach out and admit that actually, they weren’t feeling okay. I think it’s definitely opened the eyes up of a lot of people that artist’s mental health always comes first before anything else. At the end of the day I just want them all to be happy, even if that means they never release a song ever again! Your comment wasn’t sad at all, it’s an important thing to talk about xxx

      Liked by 1 person

  4. I’ve never hidden how little I know about the entire K-Pop scene but this was such a beautiful post to read purely because I feel like I was truly able to grasp how much it means to you! It was super interesting and touching to read, the rings are one of the most beautiful things I’ve ever seen, and the idea behind them is so smart. Great post, as per usual Chloe x

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you so much! That really does mean a lot. I appreciate that not everyone likes / enjoys Kpop or even really understands it but when I’m able to share the things I love in a way that makes other people understand them too…that really means the most to me. So glad you liked this 💛xx

      Liked by 1 person

  5. This is so amazing. I’m having like a kinda weird day so now hearing about Jonghyun makes me feel like im so close to crying!! Ahh so gorgeous! Makes me happy that there is such amazing kpop merch ahhh i really cant wait to have my own place and get a huge shelf for a bunch of merch lol

    Liked by 1 person

    1. Thank you! Ahh the universe always works in mysterious ways, glad I could share a little piece of Jjong with you today – sometimes we need it, right? I have the same idea as you! I’m planning on getting a bookshelf to do a little Kpop display hehe, I might do a post on it once it’s finished! X

      Liked by 1 person

  6. I’m a relatively new kpop fan, and I’ll be honest I’ve never listened to Shinee. When I heard about Jonghyun it broke my heart, I’m glad you can have little pieces of him, it’s beautiful. You speak about him with such love, I teared up a little.

    I also hope to get the Notes one day. I’d love to actually be able to read the story finally

    Have an amazing day ❤

    Liked by 1 person

  7. I really enjoyed reading this! My girls and I started our KPOP journey a little over a year ago when we discovered Stray Kids, so we still have so much to explore. We had heard a member of Shinee had suffered depression and ended his life. I had no idea about his book, so I really loved getting to learn more about that. As an adult who has battled depression and anxiety all my life, I feel so much empathy for those fighting the same battle. Most of my adult friends think it’s a bit silly I have fallen in love with KPOP along with my girls, but so much of the music has a depth of emotion that truly draws me in. Stray Kids songs and BTS especially have such strong messages of self-love and self-acceptance. This is the kind of music I want my girls to listen to. Anyway, I’m rambling now, lol. I was just very excited to read through your post and learn something new, but also see someone else out there sees the value in this music and these artists. Thanks so much for sharing!

    Liked by 2 people

    1. Thank you so much! You’re so welcome. I don’t think it’s silly at all that you’re in love with Kpop because that’s going to be me when I get older and have kids !! Kpop is literally the biggest thing in the world right now, and why? Because it’s GREAT. It’s such a happy and positive thing and millions of people (of all ages) love it, your adult friends must be INCREDIBLY dull if they think it’s silly for you to embrace something that you and your girls both love -who wants to be an ‘adult’ anyway? Who wants to get old and boring? I’m going to be 40 still loving Disney and bopping around to Kpop at every chance I get. I think it’s beautiful that you’re choosing BTS (and kpop) as the people to introduce your girls to self love, acceptance etc. and I have every faith that they’ll do a perfect job of it! So glad you enjoyed this hehe .xx

      Liked by 2 people

      1. Well, I’m pushing 42 and still freak my kids out by busting into random Disney songs or quoting the movies word for word. So just know you’re dream of what your 40’s will look like is entirely attainable, 😂!! I agree KPOP is pretty incredible. I even used Stray Kids’ “Voices” in a blog post I wrote last August because I could relate to it on such a deep level. People here tend to be hesitant to listen to music that’s not in English, but they’re missing out. And it’s funny too, because every Vlive video I watch shows all these KPOP stars listening to English music. Music is universal if you let it be.

        Liked by 1 person

        1. Oh my goodness that will be meeeeee, honestly I will never grow up or stop loving the things that make me happy just because I’ve reached a certain age – what a terrible way to live !! Very true, a lot of people feel as though they can’t connect with music and artists due to the language difference but honestly? When it comes to it there is no barrier, because music truly does transcend language and I think the size of Kpop has truly shown that and you’re right, they really are missing out! xx

          Liked by 1 person

          1. Good for you! So many people my age just seem like they are unhappy, uptight. I definitely have my moments, especially in situations where I feel anxious, but most the time I’m still the same video game loving, car concert dancing, loud person I was 20-25 years ago, lol! Age is just a number. Yes, my joints feel that number, but my soul does not!

            Liked by 1 person

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